greg! welcome the closet! since you 'dont know what it's all about' ill explain briefly...

1:we have pretty much no rules. you get warned once to stop, do it again and youre gone
2: NEVER use the word 'retarded' in any way, shape or form. same goes for "nigger" and other hateful words.
3: cursing is fully acceptable.
4: dont attack others or they will attach back. we're a very close-knit group
5: have fun and talk about life. we are very open-minded people.

~nic

and you guys can blame that labret on me.

what the fuck?! how'd we miss this last one...?

lol

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive....
So, I took her to a gas station.....
And then the fight started....

****
My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.
I turned to her and said,"Do you want to have sex?
"No," she answered.
I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And then the fight started....

********
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. > The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age.
I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. > I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me'
And she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten Disability, too'
And then the fight started.....

****

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage .
I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.
The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.
I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.'
My loving wife of 30 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'
And that's how the fight started ...


****
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'she's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many & years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started.....

****

I rear-ended a car this morning.
So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car.
You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny?
Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted,
'I AM NOT HAPPY! !!'
So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'
And then the fight started.....

****

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.
'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'
He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'
'Nah, she can order for herself.'
And then the fight started.....

****

A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible;
I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's darn near perfect.'
And then the fight started.....

Who would have thought they'd have such neat places to visit in the lowly state of New Mexico...

article can be found here: Women Get Help For ...

treatment center website: Life Healing Centre

when you hear sirens, what do you think about?

whats your favorite thing to receive as a gift - whether it be for christmas, birthday, or just because?

when/why did you get it? who did it come from? tell us here...

very funny guys. i needed a good laugh today. THANKS!

on behalf of both myself and the person who received the first official feet donation, i would like to personally thank each and every person who assisted in making one person's dream a reality. without your help, this person would have unjustly missed out on a special occasion that was important to them, and to me as well.

so, without further ado...


THANK YOU! (for all that you do),
nic

*note, this post originally appeared in the admin only section of the forums, and is being re-posted here to thank those who donated to make this dream happen. we wouldnt be who we are without each and every one of you. thank you for being here and for being who you are!

Copy & paste, then place an X by all the things you've done or remove the X from the ones you have not. Also answer the questions at the end, mmmk?

Gone on a blind date X
Skipped school X
Watched someone die X
Been to Canada X
Been to Mexico - no, and i wouldnt want to. i have enough "mexico" where i live.
Been to Florida
Been on a plane X (AND DOING IT AGAIN IN 34 DAYS!!)
Been lost X
Been on the opposite side of the country X (NORTH)
Gone to Washington, DC
Swam in the ocean X
Cried yourself to sleep X
Played cops and robber X
Recently colored with crayons X
Sang Karaoke
Paid for a meal with coins only? X
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? X
Made prank phone calls X
Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose X
Caught a snowflake on your tongue X
Danced in the rain X
Written a letter to Santa Claus X
Been kissed under the mistletoe
Watched the sunrise with someone you care about X
Blown bubbles X
Gone ice-skating
Been skinny dipping outdoors X
Gone to the movies X

1. Any nickname? nic, sin, jenn, ozzy, cousin it, baldie, and a few other ones i dont care to share
2. Mother's name? Barbara
3. Favorite drink? vanilla cream coke, cherry coke, any brown caffeinated beverage that has sugar
4. Tattoo? 0
5. Body Piercings? i have 27 piercings (total)
6. How much do you love your job? it has its days
7. Birthplace? Roswell, NM
8, Favorite vacation spot ? its been awhile. prolly canada
9. Ever been to Africa ? nope
10. Ever eaten cookies for dinner? YES, and a few times the bat and i had icecream and tater tots...
11. Ever been on TV? unfortunately
12. Ever steal any traffic sign? no comment?
13. Ever been in a car accident? Yes
14. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle? both
15. Favorite salad dressing? italian, olive garden
16. Favorite pie? i dont eat pie
17. Favorite number? dont have one, dont care
18. Favorite movie? i like scary movies
20. Favorite dessert? not big on dessert
21. Favorite food? not really. cheese, if i HAD to pick
22. Favorite day of the week? any day im not working
23. Favorite brand of body wash? most of bath and body works'
24. Favorite toothpaste? colgate with baking soda and peroxide
25. Favorite smell? again, most bath and body works' stuff, fredericks of hollywood perfume, versace's red jeans
26. What do you do to relax? Read, take a bath, both
27. How do you see yourself in 10 years? dead
28. Furthest place you will send this message? does it matter?
29. Who will respond to this the fastest? prolly gimpi or therock

wait. which of us is older? logic says that whoever is younger would be thinking like the other.... point to ponder though.
im sure i thought of it first.

very funny, jim. so funny i actually laughed. (no, really.)

and it made me think of other stuff. which made it even funnier. *cough*

side note: dont bother asking me to explain. i think its in everyone's best intentions that i not do so.

heya sweets!

welcome to the closet, its so good to have you here! and you can find the channel on irc.tech-touch.net in #naughtycloset. (being that we arent part of wyld anymore. for various stupid reasons.)

im really excited youve decided to join us. its been awhile, man. a long, long, while.

and i lost your phone number. you can pm or email it to me again, if youd like.

*hugs*

\o/ prozie!

ive thought about that more often than you'd think. heh. at the very least, i think it'd be awesome if we could all get together for a 'closet convention'. that would kick ass.

over the past few years, the naughtycloset family has pulled together when one of us is in need. its usually in the form of emotional support, but more than once, its pulling together to assist someone financially. we have, in the past, donated money to people at the drop of a hat, no questions asked. we just do it. thats the way we are.

closetmonsters are a different breed of people. if you're one of us, then you know how true that is. if you arent, maybe one day you will understand, but i doubt it.

previously, someone's distress was discussed privately, through an email, or by text message. sometimes, its even a phone call. someone who just needs to vent, to get things off their chest. most of the time, those are aimed toward me. then ive quietly approached gimpi, therock, or cyberdad. we'd discuss privately, gather donations in secret, and then make a semi-anonymous donation to the friend in need. i recently realized that there's a better way... that way takes too long, for me, at least. so i started questioning our methods and thought of a different option.

hence my newest idea.... i'll call it "feet". you'll soon understand why.

after discussing with several people who have contributed previously, and a couple who said 'i would have, had i known you guys were taking donations.' we have implemented a different way to accept donations. the contributers have given it their blessing, and we'll move forward now to how this will work.

last night, i set up an email address feet @ naughtycloset.com and a corresponding paypal account with the same address. this is in hopes that over time, those who have given previously, and those who would like to do so in the future, can send money at any time, day or night, throughout the year. a couple dollars here and there adds up over time, and means a lot to the person who needs it. sometimes, that little bit is all they have.

people who find themselves in need can request funds from the feet account. i'll discuss it with the other contributors and we'll take a vote. provided the person has good reasoning (and generally we know the person's situation anyway, since we support emotionally as well) and that there is enough funds in the account, we will send a donation to the person.

we hope to help people get back on their feet as soon as possible.

if you'd like to contribute, please donate to feet @ naughtycloset.com and help others 'get back on their feet'.

thanks,
nic

of course not, but thats what makes us good little closetmonsters, seeing things for what they really are, as opposed to how theyre supposed to be.

if you could choose how to live out your remaining days, would you choose to live a longer life but be in constant pain or would you rather be pain-free and die much sooner?

just dropping a line to say that im 'ok', whatever 'ok' means. hope everyone else is doing better than 'ok'.... i'm around, but i'm just not *here*... you know how to find me.

THERE WILL BE NO SPECIAL BILINGUAL PROGRAMS IN THE SCHOOLS..

***************

THERE WILL BE NO SPECIAL BALLOTS FOR ELECTIONS.

**************

ALL GOVERNMENT BUSINESS WILL BE CONDUCTED IN OUR LANGUAGE.

***************

FOREIGNERS WILL NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO VOTE NO MATTER HOW LONG
THEY ARE HERE.

***************

FOREIGNERS WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO HOLD POLITICAL OFFICE.

****************

FOREIGNERS WILL NOT BE A BURDEN TO THE TAXPAYERS.

****************

NO WELFARE, NO FOOD STAMPS, NO HEALTH CARE OR OTHER GOVERNMENT
ASSISTANCE PROGRAMS.

*****************

FOREIGNERS CAN INVEST IN THIS COUNTRY BUT IT MUST BE AN AMOUNT
EQUAL TO 40,000 TIMES THE DAILY MINIMUM WAGE.

*****************

IF FOREIGNERS DO COME AND WANT TO BUY LAND, THAT WILL BE OKAY. BUT
OPTIONS WILL BE RESTRICTED.......... YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED WATERFRONT
PROPERTY. THAT IS RESERVED FOR CITIZENS NATURALLY BORN INTO THIS COUNTRY.

*********************

FOREIGNERS MAY NOT PROTEST; NO DEMONSTRATIONS; NO WAVING A FOREIGN FLAG;
NO POLITICAL ORGANIZING; NO BAD-MOUTHING OUR PRESIDENT OR HIS POLICIES. IF
YOU DO, YOU WILL BE SENT HOME.

*********************

IF YOU DO COME TO THIS COUNTRY ILLEGALLY, YOU WILL BE HUNTED DOWN AND
SENT STRAIGHT TO JAIL.

*********************

HARSH, YOU SAY?............

The above laws happen to be the Immigration Laws of MEXICO!

How about that for an eye-opener?!!

On August 5, in the state of New Mexico, there was a tragic plane crash that killed the five people on board. One was the pilot, the other a flight nurse, and a flight paramedic. There was a 15 month old baby suffering from unexplained seizures, and her mother who was along to comfort her for the ride.

The plane took off from the airport in Ruidoso, headed toward Albuquerque. It didn't make it. Nobody survived.

Bill Richardson is the current governor of New Mexico. Not only did he not have the flags lowered, he didn't even acknowledge the incident - A tragedy that killed four heroes and an angel. You would think with him running for President and all, he would at least have pretended to care. President Bush probably doesn't care either. I know New Mexico is small, but that doesn't mean the people who live and work here, people who put their lives at risk every day for the greater good of society, it doesn't mean we don't count.

In striking contrast to the accident in New Mexico, just hours later, on August 6, there was another tragedy in Utah. A mine collapsed, trapping six men. They have yet to be found. Rescue efforts have continued for more than a week and a half, but had to be suspended because of yet another collapse in the mine. Three people were killed and six were injured in their efforts to rescue those who are still trapped.

And here, I commend Jon Huntsman, the governor of Utah. According to a story on Yahoo! News,

Even the President had something to say.

I hope that people see Bill Richardson for the person he is, or more importantly - the person he isn't. If he doesn't care about the people in his state, what kind of president would that make him?

Here's to you, the victims of 8-5-07, the crew and victims of N369CD: Pilot Ricky Byers, Flight Nurse Brian Miller, Flight Paramedic Deanna Palmer, Mother Tracy Smith, Baby Lilly Smith.

And here's to you, the miners and rescuers of the collapse in Utah. May you succeed in your heroic efforts.


Yahoo! News source: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070818/ap_on_...UOHyqcoO7us0NUE

To my family at Southwest MedEvac: